Sunday, March 29, 2009

perseveration aka hell

Had a bad week - Mom very obsessed with one bodily function - tells me again and again that the doctor changed the medication and that's why she's having this problem. Doctor changed the medication two years ago so this was a simple problem - she ate something wrong or has a touch of a flu. I tell her this. She argues - tells me that the doctor just did this change. Everything is compressed now. Everything she remembers has just happened. I tried to reason with her, she argues, I explain again, she argues until I finally got mad and yelled. Was very ashamed of my own behavior in the situation. I find it hard to realize that mom, my bright intelligent mom, is now unable to learn.At the Alzheimer meeting that night, I cried. So disappointed in myself - partly that I could not make her "get it".Learned that what she was doing is commom with dementia. It is called perseveration. It happens when one idea cycles and cycles through the brain. Nothing can change it. Useless to argue, lecture, try to teach or try to fix. "You know what perseveration is.....per per per." That joke was made at the table and I laughed. I now have the tool I need to deal with future cases when Mom is driving me crazy circling an idea. I can think "It's perseveration - per per per" and have a private giggle - just for me.When I saw her Friday, she had forgotten all about the intital problem. Yeah!!!!
March 29, 2009 5:31 AM

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